Expressing Self Truth in the Language of Yoga

Have you ever tried to learn a new language? Let’s say you are learning to speak Spanish. You could begin by learning how to say hello (‘hola”), please (“por favor”) and thank you (“gracias”). With this starting point, you learn not only words but how to pronounce them through manipulation of the different parts of your mouth and throat. It is a multi-dimensional process and most of us would fluctuate between just saying the words incorrectly to making sounds specific to the language without saying words. With practice the words flow correctly and one day you may even think in Spanish. As in learning a language, in yoga all parts usually do not work at once when the student first begins. The practice of yoga itself is a language and the combined elements of breath and movement are often learned as separate parts of this language before they are used together, let alone understood as a single unit.

Learning yoga, as in learning a language- is a lifelong endeavor. Though I grew up speaking English, I have never stopped learning it. As the English language can be arranged, rearranged and even re-created over and over again, so can yoga; both to a degree. With communication and relationship at the heart of language, we may use verbal skills to communicate to others, and yet our deepest intentions are communicated through tone and body language and eye contact in spite of the words we choose. Intention and words are utilized in flux with each other to refine the messages we send to one other, thus acting as just one part of developing relationships. Whether in asana or any other element our practice, we converse intentionally with every aspect of the self including body, intellect, psyche- every part of what and who we are. We also speak to the world around us.

Enter the yoga studio (or any space for that matter). The first thing you might do is search for someone; maybe your teacher or a fellow student. Your experience might range from the nervousness of trying something new to the excitement of seeing your friends. The point is we are constantly communicating and building relationships through every aspect of feeling and behavior. Suddenly every interaction is actually a profound communication.

Most important is that judgment is futile to yoga language development. At least not being aware of judgment is the one thing that will stunt the learning process. It is not the factor of exactly how things happen, but that your awareness of how they happen that matters. Any entry point into your practice is the right one as long as the awareness is primary, and even without awareness, something sparks the desire to learn and that is the beginning to finding awareness.

In yoga we are making a sort of effort toward marrying communication (behavior and speech) and intention (desire + sense of self worth). When the two are in agreement with each other all that is unnecessary dissolves. So to learn the language of yoga is to learn the language of self-realized living.

In learning the language of yoga asana came first for me, then pranayama (controlled breath). Though breath was definitely a part of my first yoga experience, my body and mind were so distracted by instructions, movements and sensations that it was a real challenge to focus on the synchronized inhale-exhale pattern. Fortunately I really didn't care that I could not do that part so well. And for your own personal comfort you should not be concerned with what is difficult to incorporate right away either. I was just having fun. When I became more familiar with the poses and movement I began paying better attention to my breath and slowly the work of learning and practicing pranayama was added to my set of skills.

With these two aspects of my favorite language now easily utilized, a couple of things have happened. I went from wondering what kind of conversation I was having with myself, to being able to listen to and cultivate self-understanding. From there many other aspects of the language of yoga were more readily assimilated. I have learned about how I wanted to think and behave and this started with knowledge of the rest of the eight limbs, all of which play an active role in my daily decision making.

Whatever your starting point happens to be-- whether meditation, postures, breath or any other yoga practice, it is good to remember that there is no real "getting there" or "knowing it" other than where you are right now knowing what you know right now. It is what exists in your immediate experience that is sacred and profound. All truth is the same truth. We can and will only communicate what exists in our direct current expereince. To venture into the process of learning yoga as a language is to remember that despite words, it is the language of the body, the breath and the gaze that we will always say what is being spoken inside.

Climbing the Tree of Yoga: Asana

There is this great book by BKS Iyengar called The Tree of Yoga. In this book, Iyengar describes and pores over the elements the eight limbs of yoga by referring to them as a tree. However, asana is not the first limb on the tree of yoga it is the third. Asana means posture or seat. My reason for choosing limb number three can be compared to how several creatures spend their lives in real trees.

Let's take a bird for instance ( I like robins). Many birds begin life in the upper branches of a tree. For a sweet little robin hatchling, the inner branches are where life may begin, thus the robin views that part of the tree as maybe the only part at first. As little robin grows into big robin, it will probably continue to favor similar branches hidden among leaves, but it will also venture down to forage for tasty little insects and such. An ant's life on the other hand may begin within the very soil in a nest at the roots of the tree. When the ant matures, as long as it's boss aunt tells it so, it will go anywhere on the tree it is commanded to. And how about a caterpillar? It may be much like a combination of the ant and bird, one day climbing to munch on leaves only to secure itself in a cozy little cocoon and emerge a flying creature preferring flowers (which in their own way are like trees).

The tree is beneficial for all and in all aspects the tree does it's job. Though the many creatures who depend on the tree for food and shelter may never explore it in its entirety, we can all agree that it would be silly to judge the behavior of these living things. And it is such with humans. When exploring a new practice, or even working in an old one we all relate to and seek out different parts based on needs and resonance. For most westerners the entry point of the tree, the place where many recognize the biggest need and feel the most resonance is asana.

According to Iyengar's break-down of the tree, the limb of asana is actually represented by the groups of limbs that extend from the trunk. Each limb representing a different posture in the yoga asana practice. Like the limbs of the tree, they are all different and each unique and important. Each posture is designed to stimulate different parts of the body and the mind.

Take twisting postures for instance. These are the poses where we wring out the spine, the internal organs and squeeze breath through a constricted lower respiratory system.

As a culture we tend to be hyper stimulated. The spine is the central location of the the many nerves that run through our body.
How are we overstimulated? Through the senses. How do the senses perceive? Through the nervous system. Every thing you expereince starts with the nervous system receiving a physical message, weather through touch, smell, taste or any other. The brain receives these messages via the often over-saturated senses and then proceeds to think about them (or sometimes just stuffs the experience into a dark corner) I won't even start to talk about the gazillions of overwhelming messages I receive daily. Do think about some of your own. Recall something someone said to you and how your body reacted. Take a bite of something you like and pay attention to how your body reacts. Think about seeing something you did not want to look at and what your physical reaction was. So most of our big Western brains are teeming with all of this crazed Western thought...and really, sometimes that is not a good thing. So what can we do for over stimulated nervous system? If it can be likened to a saturated sponge, lets wring it out with a nice twist. And to settle the mind, how about choosing to focus on our breath (pranayama...that's another entry). Why does this work? I don't know. I have theories that might hog the entire internet, but then that is just my brain doing too much again! There is solid scientific evidence for just about everything a person wants to prove, but I think the best thing to do is try it for yourself.

A twist is a nice starting point to reference the myriad benefits of asana. Twists relieve stress in the back muscles, stimulate the immune system by moving lymph, improve digestion
and lots more. It is just one asana among hundreds- and maybe even thousands now that we are getting so creative with our yoga.

If this one asana, a simple twist to the spine can do so much then just imagine the possibilities of the depth and layers of benefit of all the other asanas. And for that matter, if I am getting such immense benefit from one just asana, what is the rush in practicing the rest of the limbs?

There is no rush, no hurry, no 911. If you are present in your body in whatever you do (and one of the main gifts of asana is body presence and awareness); if you suspend your self judgment for just a tiny moment in order to observe your expereince and simply watch your life then yoga is happening- no eight limbs required. However, the remaining eight limbs are something like creeper vines. First one slowly crawls and reaches it's way into your unique personal framework, spreading its tendrils through the bricks of your very existence. Then? Maybe more come. Maybe not. But it is vines that are alive and thriving and living within you- not the ones that aren't- that count.

Do the twist:
-Sit tall at the edge of a chair in which your feet rest fully on the ground. You can stack books under your feet to get them planted if need be.
-As you breath let your belly draw out and inward, but keep it toned.
-Bring your left hand to the outside of our right knee and hold the base of the back of the chair with your right.
-Visualize your spine and breath in.
-As you exhale, twist from the lowest place in your spine possible, then let the rotation move slowly up all the way to the neck (be gentle here) as you continue to twist to the right. Take several full breaths gently deepening your twist with each exhale if it feels right.
-Do the same thing on the opposite side.
Be happy :)

Yoga refugees at Downtown Yoga: The Rufuge by Arin Trook

What happens when Yosemite National Park and the El Portal community can’t go home due to landslides and snowstorms? Read on and find out! Written by Balanced Rock Foundation’s program director Arin Trook.

The Refuge

Yoga is a practice of refuge. Slow the breath, turn the gaze inward, find a place of stillness. These are both aspects of the path, as well as the destination, for yoga practice. Yoga, in its literal translation, is union. Union of breath and body, union of spirit and mind, and union of self and other, the coming together of community in yoga, in union.

All wonderful and inspiring (if a bit uber-groovy) words. And yet the afternoon of the Storm, the first day of Spring, we were reminded of these truths in a very real way.

The First Day of Spring Storm hit Mariposa and Yosemite hard. Heavy rain and thick snow had toppled hundreds of trees, washed literally tons of stone and mud across highways, covered the high roads with thick drifts of snow. Much of the area lost power, and every road in and around Yosemite National Park was closed. Returning from a trip, my family and I had missed the last window to return home, arriving at the Highway 140 closure just minutes after the last car was allowed through. We waited out the night, and the next day, with the road still closed, began to bide our time in Mariposa. We anxiously wondered if we would be able to get home any time this week, wondering about work, about pets, about friends and family and homes. There were rumors of tree branches fallen through rooftops, power lines laying across most of El Portal’s roads.

Unable to really rest, we poked our head into the Downtown Yoga studio. And we were not alone. One by one, the El Portal refugees began to arrive, everyone trapped away from home, simply waiting. Jen Meno, as always the most gracious of hosts, had hot tea ready for us all, and soon began nudging us out onto yoga mats. Gentle music was soon on the new sound system, and one by one, individual yoga practices began.

For me, the time we spent in the Downtown Yoga studio as refugees was one of the most beautiful expressions of yoga I have experienced. The stress each of us felt being away from home and family melted away in a collective yoga practice. Our world was chaotic, the future uncertain. We were in a real crisis and yet we were in this together. And this made all the difference. We stretched our way into peace, into a gentle acceptance of the moment as is was, in all its chaos and uncertainty. This was yoga, as it was meant to be.

And then sometime in the early afternoon, Josh arrived with the news. There was a convoy from Highway 120 heading into the Yosemite and El Portal at 3 pm. If we hurried, we just might make it through the hairpin turns of Highway 49 over the Merced River in time to join the convoy and head home. The moment was broken, and we jumped into our cars to head across the county and back home.

Of course several hours later, huddling in an unlit-unheated apartment under three sleeping bags, we all had to wonder why we ever left the warmth of the Downtown Yoga refuge. What was so compelling about getting home again?

No one looks forward to crisis. Yet I was reminded again at our recent emergency town meeting in El Portal that crisis and disaster can actually be an opportunity to build stronger community. It is at times like this, when things seems incredibly dark, that we are closest to each other. And this is yoga, the practice of union, the refuge.

On and off the Mat: What is Yoga?

What is the most common thing people think of at the mention of yoga? Several immediate responses come to mind:

A) Yoga is an exercise for people who are really flexible.
B) People who do yoga like to chant "om" and say "namaste".

C) Yoga is a big mystery: what do they do in that yoga studio?

Yoga, being fairly new to the west in terms of actual length of existence (Yoga is at least 3000- 5000 years old. Some people believe yoga is as old as 40,000 years) is full of mystery, tainted with stigmas, and also appealing as a means to become a healthier and happier person. To ask the question "What is yoga?", is to begin understanding this ancient practice. But buyer beware: The answers to that query are so vast, so full of rich detail. The answers are charged with passion, opinion, history, lore and mysticism. For me, asking the question "what is yoga?" is a vital action in my daily practice as I study, observe and experience what yoga means in my life. Answering the question from a personal perspective is like explaining what a peach tastes like, why stars matter or what love is. Those types of questions are the reason we have poetry. So to start this little journey of explaining yoga, I'd like to share my favorite poem by Rumi, the 13th century Sufi pet who had a serious knack for speaking heart and spirit through his poetry. This translation is by Coleman Barks and it is from the book Birdsong.

There is a desert

I long to be walking,

a wide emptiness

peace beyond any

understanding of it.

-Rumi

What does this poem speak of and how does it pertain to yoga? Well, when I first read this poem I was a new yoga student. In my practice I was just beginning to understand a new hunger of peace in my life. I read the poem and there was such a strong resonance of its meaning that it instantly became a theme for me. Life is full of turmoil and conflict. Humanity exists in a general state of unfairness. But there is also beauty, wisdom, joy, vitality and the generosity of human spirit. Between those states of existence there are ways to discriminate and choose the latter. I want to participate in cultivating a world of health and happiness for all of humanity. When I read this poem, something big clicked for me; that the best possible way to cultivate that world wellness was to live it. The poem feels silently deep. It may seem passive in attitude but for those on a path of awakening, stillness in the surging waters of the self, a single clear pool among our own raging rivers is where we view reflections of perfect truth. Reflections of perfect truth that can be discovered in each and every human soul show us what and who we are for real.

"I thought yoga was bunch of poses and stretches."

Yes and no.

"Well, how the heck is doing poses going to create world peace? And if there is more to it, then what is it?"

Darn good question.

Second question first:

There are many many ancient and modern writings on how to do yoga. A notable and widely embraced text is The Yoga Sutras as comprised by the sage Patanjali approximately 2000 years ago (this is subject to debate). The sutras are 196 aphorisms stating how to practice yoga in order to become enlightened. In the yoga sutras the type of yoga called Raja, or "Royal" yoga is described. The practice of Raja Yoga is described in Pantanjali's eight limbs, commonly known as Ashtanga yoga. Ashtanga means "eight limbs" and is recognized mainly as a style of yoga practice presented by (the now late) Sri K Pattabhi Jois, but practicing Ashtanga yoga is not limited to this specific style. One who follows the eight limbed path might not be a student of Pattabhi Jois' Ashtanga yoga, but it can be identified as Ashtanga nonetheless.

What are the eight limbs of Ashtanga Yoga?

The yoga student gets a lot more than the mat and and abs they bargained for when they look more deeply into what a yogi practices. For me this was such a huge delight! Learning that yoga addressed not only my body, but my heart, my soul and the soul of the world sealed the deal.
The eight limbs are as follows:

Yama: Restraints

-Ahimsa, non-violence

-Satya, truth all encompassing

-Asteya, non-stealing/ non-covetousness

-Bramachaya, sexual virtue (literal translation is celibacy)

-Aparigraha, non-hoarding/ non-greed

Niyama: Observances

-Saucha, purity

-Santosa, contentment

-Tapas, ardour

-Svadhyaya, Self study/ study of God

-Isvara Pranidhana, Self surrender/ faith/ dedication to God

Asana: Postures, meditative physical practice

Pranayama: Control of the breath

Pratyahara: Withdrawal of the senses from external stimuli

Dharana: Concentration

Dhyana: meditation on a singular focus

Samadhi: Superconsciousness, awakening, knowing singularity of self and the world

Over the next few weeks I will elaborate on the eight limbs, exploring each limb individually as well as interconnectedly. Keep an eye out for The Eight Limbs series of posts.

Now to answer that second question about how doing yoga postures or asana can be a force to change the world.

You've heard the saying, "If you want to change the world, change your mind". The saying is true in many ways, especially in reference to our perspective of the world. What we see is what we experience. In many instances (and the deeper teachings of yoga tell us in ALL instances) we can change how we see life therefore affecting the meaning of life as well as the quality of our lives. If this is true, then sign me up. I have control over my experience? I can affect the world for the better? Sold! I am lucky to be an American and afford this luxury of time, space, comfort and health to explore how yoga can be a seed of world improvement. As someone with those luxuries, I consider it to be my responsibility or more appropriately my dharma, my path as well as my karma.

Does changing the world seem daunting?

Not if we view the path of change as just that: a path. One can not complete a journey of a long path in one big step, nor just by looking at the map. We must step on to the path, then begin walking. I like to do it nature hike style, enjoying the scenery and observing it's intricacies. So if the path is yoga, the steps might begin with any of the eight limbs. My first step, like many Americans was yoga postures. I was attracted to the movement and the breathing. I loved the way it made me feel. But one cannot live in a single step for to long. The next step is always one footfall ahead. For me that step was to learn that yoga was also a spiritual practice. From there I felt the urge to run, to feel the wind on my face, my heart racing with excitement. Asana got me on the path and has since fueled me to run, walk, saunter and rest along the way.

But wait, there's more!

I don't want to acknowledge asana as a mere starting point though. Asana is an intense practice if you let it be. Here's the deal: you're focusing entirely on your breath, creating as much depth and awareness in breath as possible. The teacher is offering instructions, giving guidance on how to move and manipulate the body in ways you thought only the most fit and flexible could, but your doing it! Meanwhile you're asked to pay attention to your thoughts! Dog-gonnit, if there was one thing I wanted to avoid it was my mind-voice. But here, in my yoga practice I have learned that the only way to quiet the mind-voice is to listen to what is says...without...(drum-roll please) judgment. How is this even possible? In my practice I am judging my body, my abilities, my level of competitiveness. I am judging the fact that I am judging myself. I am telling myself how great I am, how much I suck. I am telling myself that I need to practice harder, learn more, be better! But once upon a time I would not have willingly admitted to those thoughts. Not in step aerobics, not in running, not in any of my attempts to become a more valuable person by creating a better body would I have even entertained the idea that I was judging who I am. In yoga, when the teacher reminds us over and over to observe our thoughts and feelings we resist at first, but then the True Self obeys. In those observations of thought we see not what we really are, but what the mind thinks we are and should be. Thoughts and beliefs are dis-empowered, and we see that they are creation of ego. How powerful is that?

We live in one place only, through our whole lives.

This place is our individual bodies. Think about it. If you are in Yosemite and looking at a waterfall, you feel blissful and amazed. You might think "I am feeling this in Yosemite." But you are only feeling it in your sense of perceptions and that exists in your body. You feel it through your sight sense, and what you sense through your vision when you watch the cascading movement of water over magnificent stones creates peace, pleasure and awe. Peace, pleasure and awe are not in that waterfall, they are in you. You may feel a misty breeze as your skin senses movement of air and coldness. This is because of your touch sense. Your sense of touch is yours and yours alone. What you feel when moisture comes in contact with your skin happens not in those drops of water, but in you. You may hear the sound of water gushing, splashing and flowing. Then you might feel energized and invigorated. Invigoration is something that happens in your body and you respond to it because you recognize it. And only what is already known is recognizable is it not? If you want to know, "if this only happens in one place, my body, why does my experience change because of where I am, what I am doing and the event surrounding me?" One obvious reason is that we are constantly choosing different experiences for the sake of feeling different things. Another is more like going back to the question "Why does a peach taste like a peach?" When we experience the delight of a waterfall and think the waterfall is an experience that we are separate from , then we cannot experience the interconnectedness of the universe. When we realize that the energy and invigoration that seems to come from the waterfall is actually our own, we can then understand the waterfall to be an aspect of ourselves. The body moves and that gives the illusion of going to and being in different places. But can you not see the waterfall in your mind's eye? Can you not feel it in your heart? Wherever you choose to be at any given moment is where you choose to be in your body. How you experience life is a reflection of what inherently exists within you already. All this I have learned from my asana practice.

There are of course very sensitive and hard questions that must be asked about this conclusion: What about people who suffer severe poverty, disease, starvation, unclean living conditions? It is because of yoga that I feel I can explore these facts of life without judgment. If I am aware of and affected by these realities, that means that they are a part of my own disease to be healed. It is as much my responsibility to practice yoga for those who suffer deeply as it is for "myself".

So we circle back to the eight limbs.

The eight limbs are a guide for virtuous living. Virtuous living is better for the whole planet, for all people, for all living things. When we practice ahimsa, we recognize the importance of loving kindness, of gentleness of keeping anger and hatred in check. In bramacharya, sexuality is not so much of a distraction from the rest of the world, rather a sacred aspect of who we are. It is revered rather than abused. when we practice pranayama we recognize the profoundness in our choice to be alive, to make a decision to perform the life-sustaining action of breathing. In Dhyana, we acknowledge the need to understand who we are through meditation. For how can we know our children, our neighbors or our global community if we do not know our own minds?

There are endless benefits to this practice we call yoga. All of that and yoga still does not judge or decide what is more or less important. Start with something. Do that one practice forever or learn other practices as well. It does not matter. It is nice to know that here in the west, where there is lots of ridicule for the way we practice, the deeper lessons of yoga are unfolding as naturally as waterfalls pour over cliffs. And it is in large part of the practice we started on our mats: yoga asana.

Weather these things are of big or little interest to you, I hope that you have a better understanding of yoga. If you find that your are even more intrigued, join the club! Yoga is described in the Yoga Sutras by Pantanjali as sarvabhauma, meaning "all world". It is described as a practice fit for anyone who is interested. Today I want to thank you for sharing your interest by reading this! Tomorrow, look for more as I delve into the meanings and practises of each of the eight limbs of yoga.

Aum shanti,

-Jen

Your view on the guru

What is a guru?

T. Krishnamacharya: Teacher of BKS Iyengar and

Sri K. Patabbhi Jois Parmhansa Yogananda, founder of the Self Realization Fellowship

Amma, a living modern day saint and guru

I recently posed this question to some friends:
. What does "guru" mean? How does one become a guru? Do you have a guru? Is the concept of the guru confusing or clear to you? When you think of the word guru, who do you think of right away? Would a guru ever call themselves a guru? Do they have to know they are a guru to be one?

I received some wonderfully thoughtful and insightful answers. And an interesting thing happened as this conversation developed. I realized I have had many gurus in my life. The people who have represented the guru to me have come into my life most perfectly showing me things about myself that I was ready to see. I got permission from my friends to share their answers. Here they are:

"In the Patanjali Yoga sutras it says there is One Guru for all time. It, according to the Shiva Sutras, is the grace bestowing power of God, the aspect of Spirit that brings us home. It literally means the "remover of Darkness"
The highest Gurus act as a channel for this divine wisdom and light. Life itself reaches out to us as Guru if we invite Spirit to help us grow and expand and can here the voice of every event and circumstance.I've found that, despite teaming up with the universal power, that all Gurus have some personality of their own which often has what others consider flaws. That's the nature of this dense reality, so don't expect absolute conceptual perfection in anyone, even if somebody does an amazing job of themselves."

-Karl Baba

"A Guru, in generally is a person with extensive knowledge, skill, and ability; based on experience, or occupation for a particular area of study, or research.
To answer your question would a guru call themselves a “guru”:
we’d picture them to be humble and selfless. this just may not be the case. Heck I’ve been dubbed on occasion as “GURU”. Honestly; to pass the title so easily, a complete A__Hole could qualify as “GURU”. To be knowledgeable and humble is enlightenment."
-Aaron Dunson

"A few people come to mind when I think of this term. One is my therapist, who I rely on for more than helping me sort my thought & feelings. She also helps with meditation, yoga, Ayurveda hook ups, as well as spiritual balance and perspective. Other one is a teacher and friend who is yogi, she has spent her life traveling, learning and practicing all aspects of yoga. She is knowledgeable in Ayurveda and has been influential in helping bring me back to center when I'm wandering. She keeps me educated and up to date on events to encourage my practice and well being. Among so many other things they are both very similar yet extremely different. Over the last few years anytime someone directs me along the path I seemingly should be following so steadily I'm almost delivered that opportunity directly. My therapist & I spoke of Ayurveda therapy and practicing yoga and meditation more regularly and a few days later I met Adelfa a Yogi & Ayurvedic practitioner, the one I'm traveling to India with. It seems I'm attracting people to aid in the path have been searching for. Or I'm finally in the right place mentally that I can see what I may have been missing all along. ♥ "
-Carly Dodge

"This question is truly close to my heart as I have been exploring this so much lately. I have found that for me, guru is a teacher. God is everything, so God is also guru. The guru teaches you to open your heart to God by first opening your heart to guru. One must cleanse their soul before they can ascend. The purest way to this, is through the heart. A guru is a teacher, but how do you teach someone to open their heart? Unconditional love flowing to the student as well as experiences with the divine. Amma has been instrumental in showing me the difference between divine love and human love. One is conditional. The other is not in any way, and that can be felt fully. We always have love for each other, but it seems to serve some purpose for us. Even our love for ourselves...We don't love the bad. W love the good. With Amma I feel none of that. I have had my moments of "What the hay is going on?", but never have I been able to walk away from her. She is my teacher, and that is mostly felt on the subtle level for me. Being in her presence is powerful, but I feel my strongest connection in the realm of spirit. "

-Kristy Brown

Wikipedia defines Guru (Sanskrit) as "One who is regarded as having great knowledge, wisdom and authority in a certain area, and who uses it to guide others....Finding a true guru is often held to be a prerequisite for attaining self-realization"

In Richard Freeman's The Yoga Matrix
the guru is described as "The remover of darkness...the darkness of ignorance". Richard tells us that the word guru itself means heavy; defining that heaviness as ".. not moved by the changing phenomenon of the world". As students we "..initially orbit[s] around the guru attracted by the immense gravitational field of the teacher". Based on that description, I totally get it! Yes, I have found a teacher, a guru, and can count many people in my life as having been gurus who somehow drew me in with what level of truth they were fully in touch with as individuals.

The ego driven world is constantly telling us who we are and what we should be. And it is our sense of ego itself that identifies with and defines those expectations and projections. As people of the world on a whole, we may just be going around showing each other images of unrealistic expectations of ourselves. We identify with images of that which is not who we really are. It causes us to suffer greatly; taking these images of what we think we should be, trying to become things that cannot last. Things like younger, richer...and on a sub-conscious level: immortal. We cannot "be" any of these things as individuals. And what we strive for egoically we state that we "are" rich, young, etc. But what we really "are" cannot be reduced to to egoic desires. We plug along chasing an illusory carrot. As the very nature of ego is to love illusion, we may purposefully not grab the carrot out of fear that we will learn the truth of it, that it is not real. Or maybe we think the carrot is not really for us anyway, so we curse it because we cannot have it. Either way chasing or running from that carrot is the same as running to and from our gurus at the same time. That is precisely how I stumbled upon yoga. It is exactly why my life in inexplicably what it is. That is what the guru, or teacher, is for.

Gurus show us a clear reflection of what we think we should see without egoic fear of the consequences of discovering that the carrot has been unreal all along. Gurus hold up mirrors for us, not images painted by ego, without telling us what to see or what we look like. This is how we glimpse and eventually see who we really are, which is to say nothing that can really be spoken or written about because what we experience in those reflections is Pure Consciousness. A wordless, thoughtless image-less expression.

We all have a concept of what the Guru is. And therein lies the imperfection and very nature of concepts. Is a guru a perfect being? How can they be? In reversal of the famous proverb: to be human is to err. Divinity lies in non-judgment of all things earthly existent. The guru is not perfect, but has had to learn to see what is real beneath the illusion. And how else would we at first relate to a guru other than recognition of humanness? The idea of guru is a creation of the mind, of ego, yet without conceptualization what would we have to ground ourselves into as we seek the center of Pure Consciousness from which it all came? We must conceptualize the guru so we can find the guru. As for me, I have discovered someone who holds hold that mirror. I am very grateful for the conceptualization of what can actually have no concept. And in case you haven't noticed: irony doesn't affect me much. That is what I have been learning from my teacher, a small yet growing sense of that weighted heaviness. A feeling of being grounded into earthly reality yet completely connected with the ethereal. And so I think it is student who defines guru. Because through recognition of one's own sense of divinity, we are able to recognize what inspires divine opening, insight and eventually awakening.

Who is your guru? Do you have one? Does the concept of guru resonate with you? What else? The Yoga Teacher Blogspot wants to know. Thanks for reading!

-Jen

more on the definition of:

Wikipedia description guru

Sunday Breakfast Ritual: photos and recipes

Savory Double Potatoes












Preheat oven to 375 degrees.
-4 large russet potatoes, peeled and cut into 2" chunks
-4 cups Strong stock (mushroom, veg or beef)
-Olive oil
-Black Pepper
Bring stock to a boil, add potatoes, reduce heat and simmer until al dente (@ 20 min). Drain well, preserving stock for your gravy. spread potatoes out in casserole, allowing to "dry", about 5 minutes. Drench (yes drench, not drizzle) potatoes in olive oil, about 1/4 cup, then toss gently. They will absorb much of the oil. Before putting potatoes in oven sprinkle with fresh pepper to your liking and drizzle top of potatoes with more oil. Cook potatoes in oven uncovered for 20 minutes, then remove and turn to brown on other side. Return to oven and bake until edges are deep golden; about 20 minutes. Serve with eggs any style, topped with your favorite gravy and fresh chives or chopped parsley (a *must*!). I like to add sauteed mushroom or Niman Ranch balck forest ham. This is really best all in one pile as you will see below. Also really tasty with the addition of cheese melted on top..of course!

Lemon Rice Pudding













-1.5 cups dry long grain rice (Basmati or jasmine)
-3 Cups milk (rice, almond, soy, cow, whatever)
-3/4 cup sugar
-2 eggs
-Juice of 1 lemon, plus zest (optional)
-2 tbs butter, softened
-1 tbs vanilla extract
-1 package favorite fresh berries or 1/2 cup berry preserves to top
-handful of toasted nuts (pistachio, almond or macadamia are nice)
-1/4 tsp nutmeg
Prepare rice according to package directions, Transfer to 4 quart dutch oven or large sauce pan. Add milk and bring to a boil, stirring constantly. Reduce heat to med-low simmer, cover pot. Blend sugar, eggs, butter, lemon and vanilla in a bowl big enough to fit double the ingredients. Blend well with a wire whisk. Prepare ice bath: In a bowl large enough to fit a second bowl inside, place 3 cups ice then fill bowl with enough water to cover ice completely. Set aside. Uncover simmering rice blend and add a couple ladles full of the rice to the sugar-egg blend stirring. This is called tempering and it keeps you egg from becoming itty-bitty scrambled chunks, which is yucky. Now pour the tempered egg mixture back into the pot. Stirring constantly (scrape the bottom!) bring pudding to high heat. The pudding will thicken and begin to boil, but you will have to watch for thick inconsistent bubbling as it will not appear the same as boiling soup or water. Allow pudding to boil while stirring for 1 minute, then pour into the bowl which will fit into your ice bath. Place the pudding bowl into the ice bath and continue stirring for about 3 minutes, until pudding has cooled slightly. Serve warm or chilled topped with berries and toasted nuts. Yum-ola!

Thanks for the help boys!

Yay! Breakfast is ready!

Notice the teapot theme on my P.J. pants. I really wanted you to see that! I love those pajamas.

MY plate!!! Savory Double Potatoes, Sauteed mushrooms, poached egg and brown breakfast grraaaaveeee. Topped with chives! Oh, don't forget the sourdough toast for soaking up all that gravy. Sorry there is no gravy recipe here, but I eyeball this and add lots of random things. Here are some tips:
-Make a red wine sauce (Google it) with your remaining stock.
-Make gravy just like thanksgiving day, but add lots of fresh herbs like thyme, savory, parsley and basil.
-Add a little tomato sauce or juice to your gravy recipe for an added punch of flavor. Also, a dash of soy sauce, Worcestershire or splash of balsamic vinegar for a flavor kick.

Nico tells stories...

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...

Isaiah just eats.

You gonna eat those potatoes Joe?

Post your food and yoga questions here! If you are thinking of asking it, so is somebody else. I'd love to find answers for you! Thanks for reading. Peace, -Jen

The Death of a Friend and the Experience of Yoga

I lost a friend recently. My friend Cynthia was talented. A deep thinker, a questioner of all things existent, Cynthia was brilliant. Intelligent was an understatement when it came to Cynthia Smith. And though Cynthia was brilliant, she also struggled. I got to spend time with Cynthia in her best times, and she sometimes shyly opened up to me during her dark times. This last December of 2010 when Cynthia passed, the cause of her death was both mysterious and also very clear. Considering she struggled with life itself, though the details of her passing may never completely surface, all the evidence (which I won't elaborate on) points to her taking her own life and in my heart I am sure that is what happened.


It has been over a month since Cynthia's passing. And though I have lost loved ones before, I have never lost such a close friend so tragically. To add to my experience of tragedy, our last interaction which happened over a year ago led me to believe that we may not actually be able to be friends any longer. But something happens when a friendship fallen-out ends due to the loss of one of those people's lives. I discovered that there was no way ever, that we could have not been friends. Because I loved Cynthia deeply. True friendship based on love is much like the True Self. It needs nothing to sustain it. For regardless of all events, the bond remains. Only our attitudes, or our thinking, can change. Grudges count as part of the attitude and I believe that what Cynthia and I had developed were grudges against one another. This has of course effected how I feel about losing Cynthia. More importantly it has effected how I feel about the type of friend I want to be. And I was far from the perfect friend (we all are sometimes!) I wanted to share a few insights that I have gained from experiencing this loss.


I have been practicing bhakti yoga, which is to say the yoga of devotion. The idea itself can be misleading as many people view bhakti as a religious devotion to God devoid of the asana we so adore in the west. But we can practice devotion to whatever we believe God to be. So if you perceive asana to be the divine earthly representation of God, then you can practice bhakti through asana. Lately I have developed a strong sense that God not only exists in all things, but that we can experience God most powerfully through our relationships. Devotion to relationships has become my bhakti...I have long way to go! This loss, given its circumstances is proving to he a gigantic lesson in my deepest spiritual beliefs. And as such a loss does, it has caused me to question what I truly believe. The biggie: could yoga have healed my friend? And if so, why didn't it? Alas, yoga is and has healed me. But here's the thing; I chose yoga and to make the question even more complicated, the fact is that I chose yoga because it seemed to have chosen me. And my healing process began a long time ago, before Cynthia was gone. Yoga can only heal what is hurt. So any wounds inflicted are bound to be tested by my practice.


Like many, I have always believed in speaking only kindly of others and truthfully to them. But have I truly practiced this? I have not. Looking back on certain interactions that seem harmless, I realize that on a deeper level I have participated in unkind speech regarding my friend. I was also dishonest with her about "little things". In retrospect, my dishonesty seemed tiny at the time, but now I know, that though it takes real courage, full-on honesty (in which kindness is employed) is never regrettable. Am I beating myself up over it? I am not. I do have some regret, but it is the kind of regret that creates change. I am grateful to have it so profoundly brought to my attention by means of loss. I realize now what kind of friend I want to be, not just for myself, but for the entire world. Every single interaction we have with each other creates a reaction. Reaction is a form of action itself and like dominoes there is no end to the consequence of one action. No end at all. Not from the beginning of time. This is the law of karma, and when you think of karma that way, like the domino effect, you can see how it is not just about you as an individual. Like a wave in the ocean, we may each represent one molecule of water, but we are all part of the same wave.


The most phenomenal thing about this experience is that though I am grieving, I am also deeply peaceful. This sense of peace comes from knowing that nothing in earthly existence is permanent. We work so hard to preserve so many things; the earth, beloved objects, our youth, and our relationships. But all must come to an end. And what is left of the impermanent is what can never be destroyed. That is Pure Consciousness where, according to yogic views, we are destined to dissolve into. To dissolve into Pure Consciousness is self-realization. In self-realization we know that we are not truly the self-oriented, individualistic creatures we believe ourselves to be. To dissolve into pure consciousness is to know that I, you and my friend are one and the same. That when we grieve because we lose someone, the grieving comes because we feel certain we have lost a part of ourselves. We are both right and wrong. The loss like everything else is temporary. Because what is real can never be destroyed. Only the egoic connection, the belief that existence on earth is what connected us, is destroyed and we struggle to all ends trying to make sense of what feels like an amputation. But if you lost your arm, would not still be you? Though our cells and every element of our bodies is constantly dying and being reborn, then is this body who you really are? Discovering the True Self, and understanding the connection with all of humanity that is eternal begins with understanding that we are not the bodies we think we are.


I am beginning to really understand the benefits of my yoga asana practice. Sometimes we need to act physically when dealing with great challenges. Yoga for me, has provided a practice for dealing with the pain that comes into the body which is always accompanied by emotional pain. So I treated my self to a deeply spiritual yoga practice full of joy and pain, dedicated to my friend as well as to myself. I felt the emotional pain of my experience safely flood my body with each breath. I was able to release some of that pain by exhaling. For each pose that came with ease I was reminded of how easy love affairs with friends can be. With each challenge, each point of wanting to be done with certain poses, I was reminded that friendships come in a single package, and what comes in them is inseparable; the pleasant from the unpleasant. Yoga has and continues to teach me that skillful, conscious breathing with each and every life challenge acts as a vessel upon which I might travel across the sometimes calm and other times raging ocean of this life. Breath is as much the ship as it is the life preserver. Yoga has provided me with myriad practices that help me perceive life from the viewpoint of the true-self. All is temporary, and nothing that is real can ever be lost, changed or die.
The game here on earth is hide and seek with that truth. For my friend Cynthia, I think she was done counting and calling out "Ready or not, here I come!", then feeling at a loss for where truth and joy were hiding. For some reason, those two made themselves very elusive to her. I do know that I will continue to share the effect yoga has had on my life. And if through me, people stumble upon it as a practice that makes their life a better place, then I feel more purposeful and grateful for it. But I have to accept that one thing I cannot believe is that my beliefs could have saved her. Because the fact is that they did not. Nor did her own spiritual beliefs. No, I only know that what I believe and practice has thus far been able to save me.
Many blessings,
-Jen